The Boomerang Effect of Self Love

And why it’s the key to getting the love you want

A little over ten years ago a book came out entitled “Calling in The One”, in which the central premise was to follow the rules of the law of attraction to bring forth the love that you seek. The seven-week program was guaranteed to help you overcome all of the obstacles to finding the love of your life. At the time it came out I knew several women who swore by the book. In fact, one woman credits it with helping her find her husband.

Like any self-help book, it can only be as helpful as you make it. In other words, it’s up to you to do the work.

Be introspective, follow the exercises and writing prompts to find out how to get unstuck.

Only then will you attract the love you want… maybe.

I surmise that there’s more to it than that and here’s what I know:

If you are unhappy, anxious, or needy, you will attract those very things in a mate. Conversely, if you radiate love, peace, and joy, your light will shine, and you’ll attract that. The key to attracting the love you desire is loving you.

To love yourself is to accept and appreciate all of you. You begin to embrace every imperfect thing and don't feel guilty, ashamed or embarrassed.

You admire the twang when you speak.

The freckles on your face become beauty marks.

And the love handles that won’t disappear no matter how much you work out, become more insulation for the winter months.

You don’t allow the opinion of others to penetrate your heart. Instead, you laugh as they bounce off like arrows from a shield. You accept every flaw, good and bad and take responsibility for each of them without blaming others.

Many of us have practiced criticism and negative self-talk for so long that we don’t even recognize when a compliment is being given. It’s become so ingrained that it's crippled us.

Fortunately, we can break this self-loathing behavior by being gentle and talking lovingly to ourselves.

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